The Sustainist

Signs of HOPE

There are signs of HOPE all over Texas City and here is how it happened. 

On Saturday, November 19, 2016, the Rev. Robin Reeves of St. George’s Episcopal Church charged cub and boy scout troops, members and visitors to their Annual Bazaar, to take a couple of Signs of HOPE and put them where there seemed to be HOPELESSNESS in their city. The scout group took it upon themselves to help make her dream of creating a field of 500 signs of HOPE a reality. Along the way they were caught up in the joy of this simple word and began making Branded signs of HOPE. 

The seeds of the idea were planted several years ago when Reeves, in a meeting with Mayor Matthew Doyle, learned that his deepest concern was "for our youth and their lack of a vision or a hope for a future.”  In response, St. George’s built a community garden, in partnership with Blocker Middle School, Galveston County Food Bank and DSW Builders so local kids could learn how to grow and eat nutritious food. 

"You may have seen pumpkin patches,” Reeves said, “but they have to be replanted. HOPE is eternal and we want to cover the field with 500 hand-painted signs of HOPE, then invite people to pick one and carry it into the community to plant them throughout our neighborhoods.” 

“As Baptized Christians we profess in word that God is our Hope through Jesus Christ. The HOPE signs project is a way for us to proclaim in action this reality. The best time to put out HOPE signs is when you are lacking HOPE. It is what I call Holy Defiance or not giving into the temptation to despair.”

The signs of HOPE are an opportunity to return to God and put our Trust in God and God alone, not a man or government. They also provide an opportunity for us to take the high road and demonstrate love, peace, and joy in the midst of great unrest. It is an opportunity to say in spite of what is happening we have HOPE because God is good. This is our inheritance to share with the world. May we do so boldly.

You may need the HOPE sign for yourself to remind you God is God and what is happening currently is not the end of the story. Post it in a place you can see and consider praying this prayer daily during Advent with us as we await the celebration of the birth of HOPE into the world. 

Prayer: My soul waits for the Lord
More than watchmen wait for the morning, 
more than watchmen wait for the morning,
O Israel (O America), put your hope in the LORD,
for with the LORD is unfailing love
and with him is full redemption. (Psalm 130: 6-7)

I invite you to be part of this movement of HOPE, a sign at a time, making this a national movement.  So, get your HOPE Sign today.  Use it for yourself, your home and your work place.  Get a lot of them for your friends and families for the upcoming holidays.  Give the signs of HOPE:

Make a donation between $5 and $ 50 for a Hope sign at www.StGeorgestc.org or by mailing in your order to 510 13th Ave N. Texas City, 77590.   All the donations go to enable St. George's to support at-risk youth and their families. We invite you to contribute closer to the high end of the range as you are able so that we can offer the same item for people who have little to no financial resources. 
If the low end is too high for you, just take a Hope sign with you and think of exchanging it with other currencies such as time, relationship and talent that you can offer to our ministry.
Donations can be made at
#StGeorgestc.org, #SignsofHope

 

The Rev. Dr. Eric H. F. Law

The Kaleidoscope Institute

Post-Election Gracious Conversation

Thanksgiving is next week! After that, we are also facing many more occasions (Christmas, New Year) where we might be talking to friends and relatives who had voted for the other candidate on November 8. When politics come up in conversations, how can we not end up in a yelling match generating more hurt and fear?

Here are steps you can take to have a reasonable, civil and even productive conversation with those who voted differently than you:

1. Preparation: Take some time to reflect on your experience on why you voted the way you did (or if you didn’t vote, why?) and what the impact of the election results caused you personally, on your family, on your work, on your friends, on your community, etc. Pay attention to your “hot buttons.”  What would get you into a defensive, angry, and combative mode?   Mentally prepare yourself on how to get yourself back to a curious place for dialogue.  Formulate the reflections into “I” statements.  This way, you are claiming your own experience when you share while avoiding making judgment on another, which would shut down communication. Try completing these sentences:
   1. I voted for _____________ because I _____________
   2. When the election result was coming in, I ____________
   3. When I realized that the people who voted had elected Donald Trump as our next president, I _____________________
   4. In light of the election results, my concerns for me personally are ______________
   5. In light of the election results, my concerns for my family are _______________
   6. In light of the election results, my concerns for my community are ________________
   7. In light of the election results, my responsibilities are __________________

2. Decision to Engage: When it looks like you and your conversation partner are heading in the direction of talking politics, you need to make a decision as to whether this is “worth it.”  That is, why do you want to connect with this person who has a different political view?  What do you want to learn from this conversation?  Are you genuinely curious about this person’s experience?  If your decision is that it is not worth your while, then walk away.

3. Covenant for a Time and Place: If your decision is that it is important for you to stay connected with this person, then you need to ask: is this the right environment to continue this conversation?  Do we have enough time to have a meaningful conversation?  Do you need a place that is private? Where is a neutral location that may bring out the best for both of you?  Try this:
   1. I really want to talk with you about this. Can we go somewhere quiet and spend 15 minutes to have a real conversation?
   2. I really want to continue our conversation, but this is neither the time nor place for it. Can we commit to getting together for half an hour for coffee or tea at a time and place that is convenient for both of us?

4. Set Parameters and Ground-rules: Before you restart the conversation at the agreed upon time and place, you need to take the responsibility of setting down some guidelines for conversation. If it is appropriate, you can bring the bookmarks with the Respectful Communication Guidelines provided by the Kaleidoscope Institute and walk through the guidelines with your conversation partner.  For a conversational way to setting some helpful ground-rules. Try this:
   1. I would like us to have an honest, thoughtful conversation and not a debate about who is right or wrong. Because I really want to understand your experience, and I hope you would want to understand mine as well.
   2. Can we agree to share our own experiences and not try to defend anyone else or a whole party?
   3. Can we agree not to be dismissive of each other experiences? Can we not judge, blame and shame each other?
   4. Can we not interrupt each other and let each other finish our thoughts before responding?
   5. Can we agree to hang in there even when we don’t quite understand each other’s perspective yet and try to ask clarifying questions of each other?

(Note: if your conversation partner cannot agree to some kind of guidelines for communication, walk away.)

(If you are the host of an event, try making an announcement to your guests when most people have arrived like this:  I know among us, we have very different experiences of the election, and I know this topic will come up in our conversations.  So, do avoid getting into a debate which is not helpful, I would invite you agree to some guidelines for conversation during our time together when politics come up in your conversation.  Here they are: . . )

5. Start with insightful questions: Don’t begin the conversation by asking right-wrong, good-bad questions.  Start with information seeking questions that assist both of you to share your interests, values and beliefs.  Try these:
   1. What is most important to you in your political beliefs?
   2. What are the hopes, concerns and values that are at the heart of your beliefs?
   3. What life experiences have led you to believe the things you do? (Once you are able to share the values and beliefs, you can go into more specific questions about the election.)
   4. How did your values and beliefs lead you to vote the way you did at this election?
   5. What are the strength and gifts of your candidate?  What are his or her weaknesses? 
   6. Now that we have the election results, what are your hopes for the coming four years?
   7. What are your concerns and fears for the coming four years?
   8. In what ways can we stay friends and even support each other in the midst of our differences in the coming years?

6. Feedback and Staying Curious: When the conversation gets sidetracked or when you feel stuck and want to strike back or when you just don’t get it, stop, take a deep breath and refocus by asking yourself:  Am I really listening?  Am I only listening to what I want to hear and am looking for faults from the other?   Try to put yourself back in that “curious” place again and remind yourself that the purpose of this conversation is for you to not to agree but to understand the other.   Let your conversation partner know that you are trying to understand by giving feedback and asking clarifying questions.  Try these:
   1. Let me make sure I understand what you mean. You are saying that this is important to you because _____. Is that right?”
   2. (Example of clarifying questions) How did you come to believe that? Was there an experience that led to believe that?  Why is that really important to you?

(I found this helpful chart from a piece called “Reaching the Red/Blue Divide” presented by Essential Partners.)

Don't	Do
Tell them they are wrong	Ask them what value led them there
Ask how they could ever believe something	Ask when that belief first started for them
Interrupt people	Give a moment to make sure they are done
Instead of “yeah, but, what about…”	“Huh, interesting, tell me more…”
Try to assume you know their motives	Ask about their goals and hopes
Blame them for your anger or frustration	Explain your frustration and take responsibility for it

7. Thank your Conversation Partner:  When the conversation comes to a natural stopping place, share what you've learned from this conversation and invite your conversation partner to do the same.  Then thank the other for willing to enter into a truthful conversation with you.  If appropriate, pray together and set another time to further the conversation.

 

Eric H. F. Law

Kaleidoscope Institute
For competent leadership in a diverse changing world
www.kscopeinstitute.org                

Post Election Truth Event

When we win, our instinct is to celebrate, to announce the good news to others or even gloat about it.  In a political election, like the one that the United States just completed this week, the winners usually received the most votes.  With the majority support, the winner and the winning party might be tempted to do whatever they want discounting the needs of the losers – the minorities? 

Throughout history in the world, the winners of a political battle not only ignored the needs of the losers, they often went further in persecuting the losers in order to suppress any possible future revolts.  Not so with a democratic society like the United States of America. The founders of the United States knew that if the winner of an election persecuted and ignored the needs of the minority groups, it is no better than any other dictatorial or totalitarian government.  What makes a democratic government difference is that it continues to honor the rights of the losers, the minority, even though they have lost. 

This is why the Bills of Rights were such important amendments to the U.S. Constitution. The right to have “freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances. . . . [and the]  right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures,” were not written for the powerful in a democratic government because anyone or group that has power already has the right to speak their mind without fear of persecution.   They already have the right to publish anything they want without the fear of being censored.   They already have the right to ensure their own privacy, especially when power comes with money.  The Bills of Rights were written to protect those who are powerless, the minority, the losers of elections.  Even though they have lost, they still have the right to speak and write about their experiences, the right to assemble, the right to petition the government, without the fear of persecution and retaliation.

How do these rights of the minorities impact the victors of a democratic election?   By all means, the winners should celebrate and to make known their victory to others.  However, a winner in a democratic government must also take the responsibility to protect the rights of the ones who have lost – the minority.  The best way to do that is to listen. This listening cannot be a hollow gesture to appease the dissenting voice.  For this to work, the goal of this listening is to achieve understanding.  Achieving understanding does not mean one has to agree with everything that the other shares.  The discipline of listening will increase the sensitivity of those who are in power as they make decisions for the whole.

The responsibility of the losers of an election is to take some time to reflect on the experience of being the minority.  Take time to understanding why the winner and his party were capturing the support of so many people.  Again, you do not have to agree but need to understand it.  Take the time to discern, given what has happened, what are your needs and concerns that are significant and important to you and your group.  Then find ways to articulate your needs as an individual and as a community knowing that the losers still have the rights to speak, to publish, to assemble and to petition.  

Our tendency, as losers, is to immediately start planning for retaliation – to make the winners’ lives difficult.  In some places, this impulse to retaliate may include violence. If we do that, we are no better than those who employ terrorist attacks on the majority because they do not get what they want. We must find ways to work out our differences with non-violent civility. In a democratic society, we must remember that the losers’ rights are still intact and that these rights will continue to give us channels to voice our concerns and needs.

Before we arrive at any constructive decision, we must have understanding.  And understanding requires that the powerless groups to be able to articulate their needs in constructive ways while the powerful are able to listen.  The common bond that holds us together is that we agreed to be part of a society that values each person or group’s rights. 

I propose the following truth event for communities that have both winners and losers after an election:

1. Invite participants to affirm the Respectful Communication Guidelines.
2. Read the Preamble and the First Amendment of the Constitution of the United States of America.
3. Invite participants to consider the following questions.
• How did the results of the election impact my life?
• Answer one of the following:
• As part of the winning party of this election, what are my responsibilities?
• As part of the losing party of this election, what are my concerns and needs?

4. Invite the losers of this election to sit in a circle in the middle of the room. Invite the rest to sit in an outer circle.
5. Using Mutual Invitation, invite members of the inner circle to share their reflections on their questions.
6. After the inner circle has shared, invite a moment of silence.
7. Invite the member of the outer circle to switch seats with the inner circle.
8. Using Mutual Invitation, invite members of the winning party to share their reflections on their questions.
9. When everyone has shared, invite participants to consider completing and sharing the sentences:
   1. I noticed . . .
   2. I wonder . . .
10. End the gathering by asking participants to complete and share the sentence:
    1. Democracy is . . .

Reflection Questions for Proper 28 (Year C) Isaiah 65:17-25   How does this vision challenge our society today? Canticle 9 – Isaiah 12:2-6   How do we draw water from the spring of salvation? 2 Thessalonians 3:6-14   What did you learn from this text about work and community? Luke 21:5-19   What does this text teach you about how to deal with change?

Eric H. F. Law

Kaleidoscope Institute
For competent leadership in a diverse changing world
www.kscopeinstitute.org