The Sustainist

Life Skillz Circle

In 2012, two members of First Presbyterian Church, San Bernardino went to a Holy Currencies retreat sponsored by the Presbytery.  While we were exploring the currencies of truth and wellness, one of them shared that they have found out that the high school next door to their church had a 27% gradation rate.   The truth of un-wellness drove us to explore what the church might do to foster wellness for the young people in their community. One of the ideas that caught a lot of energy was to train caring adult volunteers from the church to meet with 10^th graders once a week in order to provide more stability and support network that could help them develop their life-skills.  We were calling this idea Life Skillz Circle.  They brought this idea back to their church and the leadership approved to invest some money, from a recent inheritance, to commission the Kaleidoscope Institute to assist them in this effort.

As their consultant, the first thing I challenged them to do was to develop their currency of relationship with the school.  The story went like this:  the pastor and a group of lay leaders made an appointment to see the principal of the school.  They told her that they are members of this community and they were concerned about the low graduation rate at the school.  They were not there to judge nor to proselytize, but to explore ways that they could help.   To their surprise, the principal enthusiastically shared with them a list of things that they could do.  During the following 6 months in 2013, members of the church wrote a thousand notes of encouragement and sent a carload of snacks to the students while they were doing the state test, they hosted an end of season celebration at the church for two sports teams, they patronized their bakery and flower shop and some of them volunteered to assist in the Safety Ambassador program.  The principal was attending their planning meeting regularly and when she could not attend, she would send a school counselor in her place. 

A year since the initial idea of the Life Skillz Circle was named, the currency of relationship was well developed.  Through these trusting relationships, the church members discovered the truth that they needed to know in order to launch this ministry.  Initially, they thought that the students would come to the church after school for their weekly gatherings.  After listening to the principal, the counselors, teachers and students they had gotten to know, they determined that the best time was Monday morning at 8 am and the best place to meet was one of the classrooms.  The currency of truth exchanges into a relocation of their currency of time and place.  And of course, food would be a major factor to keep the students coming.

We are now in the fall of 2013.  The plan was to launch the first Life Skillz Circle in January 2014.  The principal said that she wanted to make sure this first circle would be a success; she and the counselor would personally invite the first group of 10^th graders to participate in this pilot group.  The currency of relationship was paying off.

There were apprehensions, however, about whether they were ready to do this.  As one of the empty nesters said, “I have time but what do I have to offer these students?  What if the answer is nothing but my ‘mom-ness’? In spite of this fear, it felt right.”  In Holy Currency terminology, they were in need of developing a currency of gracious leadership.  While they were building relationships with the school, I worked with a group of church members and teachers and developed a 12-week curriculum incorporating the basic gracious leadership skills taught by the Kaleidoscope Institute.  In the fall of 2013, I facilitated a training session for caring adults who could serve as group leaders using the Life Skillz curriculum.

The first week in 2014, they stood in room B109, armed with worksheets, sign-in sheets, and get-to-know-you surveys, wondering if any students would come.  Who would eat all this breakfast they had brought? Slowly, the students arrived, looking anxious, and not entirely sure why they were there.  One of the volunteer caring adults wrote in a report of that first session,  

In that first hour, one of them tells us his parents are separating, and he’s torn: which house should he choose?  And we know we are in the right place.  You would love these kids:  the quiet, caring 4.0 GPA football player and member of the track team; the sweet and funny AVID student and her best friend who loves Zombie movies and has a “sixth sense” about things; the Sophomore class president who loves European history and is a self-proclaimed nerd; and the football quarterback who is determined to succeed despite immeasurable odds.  They are smart, funny, and surprisingly comfortable with us.

[The Life Skillz] curriculum gave us confidence to engage in this process and many of the elements have provided some great discussions.  . . . At times I have worried about what I will say or do at a given meeting, but a turning point for me was hearing of one of them say, “I just like talking”. Maybe all they are asking is to been seen and to be heard. . .  Just like the rest of us.

At the end of the spring semester, the students expressed the need to continue meeting.  One volunteer recalled,  “One student shared that if we were to stop this, he would feel lost.  Our hope is to be there when he graduates in 2016.”  They met a few more times at church members’ homes and they also took two students on a field trip to the University of Redlands where college students shared their college experience and connected with them as only young people could.

By the summer of 2014, the good people of First Presbyterian Church had become a fixture at San Bernardino High School.  They brought leftovers to the front office and had hosted Mr. Cardinal mock interviews, getting to know more amazing students.  The school asked the church to expand the Life Skillz Circle as part of a new leadership curriculum, taking on a group of freshman in the fall. 

At the start of the school year, the students from the first circle now served as ambassadors for the Life Skillz Circle by talking to the freshmen encouraging them to join a new circle.  One of the church volunteers went with four of them to two classes and reported, “I was overwhelmed by their insight into what this group is becoming and what it means to them.  One student said it had become his other family and they all talked about the friendship, trust and enjoyment they find with this group.  As always, I feel blessed to have the opportunity to work with these kids.  They fill my heart.” 

As of the fall of 2014, there are two Life Skillz Circles at San Bernardino High School – one with the original group plus their friends and the other with a group freshmen.  And the cycle of blessings continues.

Upcoming Opportunities to Study with The Sustainist and learn more about Holy Conferencing: February 13-14, 2015 Oakland, CA Gracious Leadership Training I KI Catalyst (Facilitator) Training (for Gracious Leadership I only) (Bilingual Spanish-English Event) March 19-24, 2015 Los Angeles, CA Gracious Leadership Training Holy Currencies: Creating Sustainable Missional Ministries KI Catalyst (Facilitator) Training April 21-25, 2015 Sewanee, TN Gracious Leadership Training Missional Ministries in the Grace Margin (Register with Sewanee School of Theology, Beecken Center) July 20-25, 2015 Los Angeles, CA Gracious Leadership Training Holy Currencies: Creating Sustainable Missional Ministries KI Catalyst (Facilitator) Training November 1-5, 2015 Memphis, TN Holy Currencies: Creating Sustainable Missional Ministries KI Catalyst (Facilitator) Training www.kscopeinstitute.org

Reflection Questions for 4th Sunday after Epiphany (Year B) Deuteronomy 18:15-20    What does it mean to be raised up as a prophet for God? Psalm 111    How is the fear of God the beginning of wisdom? 1Corinthians 8:1-13   What does it mean to exist through Christ? Mark 1:21-28   How do you recognize teaching with authority?

Eric H. F. Law
Kaleidoscope Institute
For competent leadership in a diverse changing world
www.kscopeinstitute.org

A Truth Event in God’s Image

By guest blogger: Mike Delaney, Minister of Formation, Beautiful Way Christian Church, Latonia, Kentucky

There are various settings in which Eric Law’s “truth event” could be utilized.  Perhaps the foremost possibility would be to give people with different perspectives, including uncertain knowledge about potentially controversial or sensitive topics, an opportunity to listen with less fear of conflict to relationships.  For my church, Beautiful Way Christian Church, a new church plant in the Northern Kentucky area with a specific mission of healing for wholeness in Christ, “being made in God’s image” for a church with numerous people with all types of disabilities- physical, developmental, and mental health- the topic had only one challenging component.    

We also embraced Dr. Law’s six “cycle of blessings” as our new congregation’s core values because we wanted to engage in sound stewardship from the time of our conception.  As we also looked ahead to only our second gathering as a new church to be held in July, 2014, we had two dozen people still wondering what this new church was about and who needed to be educated quickly about its mission and values, preferably through experience.  A church event that integrated all of these dynamics in both a relevant and difference-making way for a fledgling community to attract people and not drive humans away was needed. 

In only our second gathering as a new congregation on July 19, 2014, we successfully brought 28 people together, including a panel of six people with unique professional and personal views on “what it means to be created in the image of God,” each speaking  for five minutes or less.  We wanted to undertake the truth event as an external event because we already perceived our congregation as inclusive, and we did not really anticipate adversarial guests (the healthcare CEO was confined to a wheelchair), but we did want views from people in the larger community who represented those with power and the less powerful, or their representatives.  Accepting our invitation was a seven-year-old boy and oldest boy of a single mother of three, a nurse educator from one of the nation’s leading pediatric hospitals and mother of an adult daughter of a co-occurring disorder, an admissions specialist for a family and parenting community organization, a commonwealth attorney for three Kentucky counties, a CPA and investment counselor, and the CEO of a local healthcare organization.  A church member and Chair of a local university’s Communication Department was honored to facilitate the panel which was repeatedly described as a non-debate.  Following each presenter’s turn at expressing what being created in God’s image meant to him or her, members of the congregation had an opportunity to express how any individual or sum of the presenters made them think and feel.

The event was successful, because everyone delighted in the harmony amid such diversity.  The truth panel approach, also previously not known among anyone, was considered a comfortable and worthwhile way to become acquainted with diverse views.  If anything was lacking in this maiden truth event it might have been too harmonious.  The first person to begin was the seven- year-old who did not hesitate to announce, “being created in God’s image means you wake up every morning happy!”  Immediately each subsequent presenter proclaimed their serious agreement with David, and only late in some of the sharing did three of the older panelists express that remembering they and other people are created in God’s image has its moments.  This was especially true for the CPA who reflected at times on his Jewish heritage and current events in Israel, and the Commonwealth attorney’s involvement in difficult criminal cases.  In previous blogs Dr. Law offers excellent questions prepared in advance requiring greater reflection and specific possibilities for divergence, but again, the desired outcomes of the truth event’s aim will need to be considered.  To some extent, while we have multiple objectives, we also want to attempt our first of what will be many truth events to come.

Upcoming Opportunities to Study with The Sustainist and learn more about Holy Conferencing: February 13-14, 2015 Oakland, CA Gracious Leadership Training I KI Catalyst (Facilitator) Training (for Gracious Leadership I only) (Bilingual Spanish-English Event) March 19-24, 2015 Los Angeles, CA Gracious Leadership Training Holy Currencies: Creating Sustainable Missional Ministries KI Catalyst (Facilitator) Training April 21-25, 2015 Sewanee, TN Gracious Leadership Training Missional Ministries in the Grace Margin (Register with Sewanee School of Theology, Beecken Center) July 20-25, 2015 Los Angeles, CA Gracious Leadership Training Holy Currencies: Creating Sustainable Missional Ministries KI Catalyst (Facilitator) Training November 1-5, 2015 Memphis, TN Holy Currencies: Creating Sustainable Missional Ministries KI Catalyst (Facilitator) Training www.kscopeinstitute.org

Reflection Questions for 3rd Sunday after Epiphany (Year B) Jonah 3:1-5, 10    What did you learn from this story about God? Psalm 62:6-14    What is the story of the relationship between people and God? 1Corinthians 7:29-31   What is the understanding of time in this text? Mark 1:14-20   What is the consequences for following Jesus?

Eric H. F. Law
Kaleidoscope Institute
For competent leadership in a diverse changing world
www.kscopeinstitute.org

Come and I Will Give You Rest

A song by Eric H. F. Law

For too long I’ve sung the freedom songs
For too long I’ve marched to right the wrongs
But nothing ever really changed
Evil’s pattern simply rearranged
I’m so tired; I’m falling
All my hopes are stalling
Then I hear a gentle voice calling:

Come, come to me, all of you who are weary
Come, as you are, all of you who are heavy laden
Come and I will give you rest
Come

For too long I’ve run the righteous race
Could this world be running out of grace?
I'm afraid we'll lose our souls

In this world of merciless controls
I’m so tired; I’m falling
All my dreams are crawling
Then I hear a gentle voice calling

Come, come to me, all of you who are weary
Come, as you are, all of you who are heavy laden
Come and I will give you rest
Come

Take my yoke upon you and learn from me
My yoke is easy
My breath is breezy
Breathe my spirit in you; discern from me
I’m not judgmental
My heart is gentle
With the common passion that we share
We will ease the burden that you bear

Painting by Casey McGlynn

Come with your friends, with your foes, and your quarrel
Come with your rage, with wounds and your battered moral
Come with your fear, with your loss, and your sorrow
Come with your frail, faded hope of a just tomorrow
Come with your cold, burnt-out souls and your yearnings
Come, I’ll ignite flames of hope and we’ll keep them burning

Come and I will give you rest
Come and I will give you rest
Come

Copyright © Eric H. F. Law, 2015

Upcoming Opportunities to Study with The Sustainist and learn more about Holy Conferencing: January 19-23, 2015 Chicago, IL Gracious Leadership Training I and II Community Transformation I (Offered by the Doctor of Ministry program of Bexley-Seabury Seminary) February 13-14, 2015 Oakland, CA Gracious Leadership Training I KI Catalyst (Facilitator) Training (for Gracious Leadership I only) (Bilingual Spanish-English Event) March 19-24, 2015 Los Angeles, CA Gracious Leadership Training Holy Currencies: Creating Sustainable Missional Ministries KI Catalyst (Facilitator) Training April 21-25, 2015 Sewanee, TN Gracious Leadership Training Missional Ministries in the Grace Margin (Register with Sewanee School of Theology, Beecken Center) July 20-25, 2015 Los Angeles, CA Gracious Leadership Training Holy Currencies: Creating Sustainable Missional Ministries KI Catalyst (Facilitator) Training November 1-5, 2015 Memphis, TN Holy Currencies: Creating Sustainable Missional Ministries KI Catalyst (Facilitator) Training www.kscopeinstitute.org

Reflection Questions for 2nd Sunday after Epiphany (Year B) 1 Samuel 3:1-10(11-20)    How did you learn from this story about discerning God’s voice? Psalm 139, 1-5, 12-17    How does this Psalm speak to you about your relationship with God? 1Corinthians 6:12-20   What does it mean for your body to be the temple of the Holy Spirit? John 1:43-51   How do you know whom you should follow?

Eric H. F. Law
Kaleidoscope Institute
For competent leadership in a diverse changing world
www.kscopeinstitute.org

The Gift

More than once I overheard someone said with a sigh of relief, “Thank God the holidays are over!” Then I recalled seeing frantic shoppers before Christmas trying the find the right gifts for the people to whom they are obligated to give gifts. I also remembered the advice from the media about how to save money and stay in your budget when you buy gifts.  If gift giving is being reduced to just an obligation and is measured as a commodity, then it would be a relief to have it be done with until the next birthday or anniversary or Christmas.  

In the classic book, The Gift, Lewis Hyde studied many traditional stories from different cultures about the concept of gift exchange.  He wrote:

These stories present gift exchange as a companion to transformation, a sort of guardian or marker or catalyst.  It is also the case that a gift may be the actual agent of change, the bearer of new life.  In the simplest examples, gifts carry an identity with them, and to accept the gift amounts to incorporating the new identity.

There are at least 3 obligations to gift economy – the obligation to give, the obligation to accept, and the obligation to reciprocate.  In many of the cultural stories that Hyde examined, the reciprocation may not go directly back to the original giver but to a third party.  In many cases, the gift is expected keep flowing through out the community and may eventually return to the original giver in different forms.  Hyde wrote, “. . . a gift that cannot be given away ceases to be a gift.  The spirit of a gift is kept alive by its constant donation.”

For Christians, one of the greatest gifts that we receive is Jesus.  To accept this gift is to incorporate a new identity embodied by the words and actions of Jesus.  At the baptism of Jesus, the voice of God said, “You are my beloved son; with you I am well pleased.” Jesus taught us, in the Lord’s Prayer, to call God “Father.”  The actual word that Jesus used was “Abba” which was what a child would call her parent in the language that Jesus spoke.  Jesus as the catalyst transforms our relationship with God to that of parent-child relationship – this is the gift, the new identity.  We are to reciprocate by giving this gift to others by treating them also as children of God so that this gift can be kept alive and continue to increase and flow through our communities through out the earth. 

I invite my readers to start this year by saying this mantra every morning, “I am a beloved child of God, with whom God is well pleased.”  Then as you go through the day, affirm each person you encounter (in your family, neighborhood, workplace, school, etc.) also as beloved child of God by silently saying, “You are a beloved child of God with whom God is well pleased.”  In some cases, it might be appropriate to say it out loud.  When we give this gift to ourselves and to everyone we encounter, we might become catalysts who actually transform this world!

Upcoming Opportunities to Study with The Sustainist and learn more about Holy Conferencing: January 19-23, 2015 Chicago, IL Gracious Leadership Training I and II Community Transformation I (Offered by the Doctor of Ministry program of Bexley-Seabury Seminary) February 13-14, 2015 Oakland, CA Gracious Leadership Training I (Bilingual Spanish-English Event) KI Catalyst (Facilitator) Training (for Gracious Leadership I only) March 19-24, 2015 Los Angeles, CA Gracious Leadership Training Holy Currencies: Creating Sustainable Missional Ministries KI Catalyst (Facilitator) Training April 21-25, 2015 Sewanee, TN Gracious Leadership Training Missional Ministries in the Grace Margin (Register with Sewanee School of Theology, Beecken Center) July 20-25, 2015 Los Angeles, CA Gracious Leadership Training Holy Currencies: Creating Sustainable Missional Ministries KI Catalyst (Facilitator) Training November 1-5, 2015 Memphis, TN Holy Currencies: Creating Sustainable Missional Ministries KI Catalyst (Facilitator) Training Register at:  www.kscopeinstitute.org

Reflection Questions for 1st Sunday after Epiphany (Year B) Genesis 1:1-5    How does it mean to believe in a God who created night and day? Psalm 29    Where do you hear God’s voice? Acts 19:1-7   What does being baptized in the name of Jesus mean? Mark 1:4-11   What would our community be like if we believe that everyone is a beloved child of God?

Eric H. F. Law
Kaleidoscope Institute
For competent leadership in a diverse changing world
www.kscopeinstitute.org